Hotter than a real Chinese firecracker

Yikes. Another 100 degree day arrives here in the great Pacific Northwest. Granted, when it nears 65 degrees in these here parts, shorts and sweatshirts are normal attire. Hot and cold mean something different to us, compared to, oh, say, my relatives' definition of weather in Nebraska.

When the temperature rises to three digits, well, as you might guess, we are hot, and we are bothered. Me? I'm trying to chill out by checking out what's new and newsy. (I'm also wondering for the zillionth time why I don't own an air-conditioned house. And unlike previous scorching days, when we'd drive our air-conditioned cars around to cool off, well, that little gas-price problem has stopped that method of lowering the body temperature.)

Burning Olympics topic:: No, I'm not wondering how the swimmers get into those itsy bitsy teeny weeny suits. I'm thinking ahead to the next Summer Olympics, the London 2012 version. You know, I hope, that you will not see softball or baseball, but you can still watch the heart-thumpin' drama of the flight of the shuttlecock. Yes, Badminton, the "world's fastest racket sport" will still award gold medals, as will Table Tennis, Taekwondo, Handball and the subject of one of a most-hilarious skit on "Saturday Night Live," with Martin Short and Harry Shearer.

http://video.aol.com/video-detail/mens-synchronized-swimming/1980340333

No offense to any of these sports, or the athletes who participate in them, but somehow, my viewing habits tend toward other areas:: Gymnastics, Swimming, Track and Field. You know, the sports that get the highest viewership, things like that.

But in a secret International Olympic Committee (IOC) in 2005, only baseball and softball were eliminated from the list of Olympic sports. Someone reported that these two sports were "too American." The last sport eliminated from the Olympics was polo, in 1936. "Live Pigeon Shooting" was eliminated in 1900 -- the gold medal was awarded to the athlete who killed the most birds -- but I suspect no one misses that "sport."

Oh, in case you missed it, Badminton Doubles gold went to China, the silver was won by Korea and the bronze went to China. Is that "too Asian?"

Potential hot top alert:: The Census Bureau released a report a couple of days ago that informed us that white Americans will no longer be a majority by 2042. (Disclaimer: I'm a white female. The female part probably makes me more of a minority in many ways than the "white" part.) Just four years ago, The Census folks projected the white minority would occur in 2050. Why do I feel an uncomfortable event or situation coming on? It's partly the fault of aging Baby Boomers. But perhaps we need to discuss this situation before people work themselves into a sweat over the change. But maybe I'm too cynical. Or too pale. Or too hot. Anyone out there have an opinion?

Shaken, not stirred:: Child, Julia Child. Who knew? Hot topic yesterday was the just-released documents of people who spied for the OSS during World War II. According to the CIA (the OSS was folded into the CIA after Pres. Truman disbanded it in 1945), that tasty little souffle Ms. Child was cooking in her TV kitchen might have had a coded message baked inside.

Other undercover agents included: Boston Red Sox catcher Moe Berg; actor Sterling Hayden; Kermit Roosevelt, son of the Pres. known as "Teddy"; Supreme Court Justice Arthur Goldberg; and Miles Copeland, pop of pop band The Police's drummer Stewart Copeland.

Some 750,000 documents detailing the OSS operatives were CIA-classified for decades; the National Archives let 'em out yesterday, hot off the press.

Are you thinking "Big Hollywood Movie" like yours truly?

Hunk of burning science news:: Divers have discovered 13 new species of fish near Micronesia (if you're somewhat geographically impaired as I am, you'll know the place because TV's "Survivor" has filmed two seasons there). A quote I saw under one of the photos released by the BBC made me wonder if this was a good-or-bad-news situation: "The bright blue damselfish is finally in the hands of science."

Despite an urge to avoid going outside, I must. As I leave, sunscreened from head-to-toe, I'll leave you with this thought.

Quote O' The Day:: "I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean." ~G.K. Chesterton

That's all she wrote. Today. Until later...

Liar, liar pants on fire

Before I discuss the fountain of fibs in the news lately, I'd be remiss not to share a photo of my friend and not-constant companion (he belongs to friends, but loves me, anyway). His antics have slowed my blog musings -- what? You thought I wrote these passages without wearing sunglasses? He ate mine, just a day after being diagnosed with pancreatitis. He'll be okay, the vet says. The sunglasses, however, are ... well, somewhere in his digestive system.

Without further ado, my pal Rome.

More on the Susan G. Komen Foundation at a later date. Irony of ironies, my dad is scheduled for a mammogram tomorrow. My mom has no idea how this is accomplished, and my sister and I are clueless as well.

But onto the tall tales of the past week...

Bad sports:: The Chinese. C'mon. Pavarotti had to lip-sync while singing at the 2006 Winter Game because of the bitter cold. He was an opera star. But the Chinese substituted a different girl to fake her way through "Ode To The Motherland" during the Olympics' Opening Ceremony because she was "cuter" than the 7-year-old who really belted it out? Talk about giving the real singer a complex. I think both girls are cute. Check it out here.

Then we find out the awe-inspiring fireworks display was also "tweaked?" What? Chinese? Firecrackers? Faked? This incident reminds me of the fear of computers that scifi writers threw at us years ago. First, you mess around a tiny bit with The Olympics, then you fake The President's press briefings because he got shot by The Vice President. Or something like that.

When it's okay to lie:: In the past week or so, 125,000 gorillas -- classified as "critically endangered" -- were spotted in the Congo. Dang it. Did we really have to know this until some wildlife folks got a handle on this, to keep the poachers away?

Then someone started yapping about an "undiscovered" waterfall in the Amazon region. Oh, some locals knew about it, but now that the word is out, expeditions are on their way to see and document this treasure.

Not a lie, exactly:: Also in the undiscovered news category was the announcement was the report detailing the findings of Roman ruins in the ancient Jewish capital of Galilee in Israel. Apparently, the city of Zippori housed a significant pagan population, who with Jewish and Christian neighbors, developed a hometown with various kinds of buildings. Neat archaeological info. But the article in LiveScience, describe a temple depicting the Roman gods Zeus and Tyche.

Now, as a dedicated Xena: Warrior Princess fan, I know that these two gods were Greek. I tried to find an explanation of why the Roman gods weren't named Jupiter and Fortuna on this temple, but alas, I gave up. Poor scholar that I am, perhaps someone can set me straight here.

Who should know when not to lie:: John Edwards. You were running for President, sir, and when the you-admitted-it affair occurred, your wife was battling cancer. Did he actually think this information would remain buried? This is mind-numbing. Enough said.

And yes, telemarketers lie, but:: I don't have any aversion to junk mail. Frankly, I miss finding anything in my mailbox. (Like even a "what are ya up to card" from friends -- hint, hint.) Sure, from an ecological viewpoint, saving all that paper is great. (I wonder, though, scientific genius that I am, if all the computers buzzing out spam and e-mails are all that much better.)

But there are folks who just don't want anything in their mailboxes they didn't ask for. They're adamant about not receiving junk. They're ticked. Fightin' mad. So I shouldn't have been startled to see what creative people do with junk mail. Quite fascinating, and in the case of #7, well, it seems a bit extreme to me, but read what some people do with bricks.

That's it. I think I need to ponder animals, like my friend Rome. Studies (you know, three-out-of-four-internal physicians-report kind-of studies) say that human blood pressure lowers while petting an animal, as does the pet. So, here's a fitting thought.

Quote O' The Day:: "It's funny how dogs and cats know the insides of other folks better than other folks do, isn't it?" ~Eleanor H. Porter, in "Pollyanna"

And that's all she wrote. Today. Until later...

Laughter:: The Best Medicine?

So. I said I'd blog every other day. Whatever. That was before I broke a tooth; fell off a bike and sprained my hand (while explaining "Why-you-shouldn't-be-afraid-to-ride" to a 7-year-old); tore two contact lenses; and spent seven hours in the emergency room while my dad was poked, probed and patronized. These events occur, of course, but should they happen in a week's time? No. Nada. Never. Not again.

So bruised, tired and quite crabby, I perused the web (one-handed, of course) to cheer myself up. I managed to find a few tidbits to temper my grumpiness. Sharing is a picker-upper, so here's my take on things floating in cyberspace.

Really made me guffaw:: Yesterday's press release from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The folks there claim hospital ER waiting time has increased by 28 minutes. Okaaaay. The wait is now one hour, up from 38 minutes, the CDC announced. One hour? Are they serious? I've never spent less than three hours in any emergency room. Were the CDC people referring to veterinary emergency centers? One hour in ER? Surely they jest. But you can read a report here.

Scotty -- Beam him back up:: I feel rude for chuckling at this, but, really: What are the odds of such an event? James Doohan, otherwise known as Chief Engineer Scotty from TV's Star Trek, was supposed to be eternally enshrined in space when his cremains (the remains after his death) were put on SpaceX Falcon 1. Unfortunately for Doohan and the others who pre-planned their last great adventure, the rocket didn't reach orbit. Worse yet -- his ashes were destroyed in the failed launch. Read the captain's log, I mean, article, here. Yes, Mr. Spock, illogical.

Way to describe what ails you:: It's a "scum-sucking pig of a disease that treats everyone differently." That's how actress and funny lady Teri Garr describes MS, the condition that plagued her 17 years before she got a diagnosis. Great story about her current status here; she's an inspiration. There's no cure for MS; why not?

Reasons why Baby Boomers rock:: An uplifting article in AARP magazine (it's not your grandma's magazine, anymore, bay-bee), explains why anyone older than 49 will appreciate "50 Reasons To Love Being Over 50." Drum roll, please, for number 14: "Because if Keith Richards (of The Rolling Stones, of course) can make it into his 6os, there's hope for us all."

A couple of health-scare moments for him include an incident in 1996. While he was reaching for a book in his home library, he got pummeled by an avalanche of texts, suffering three broken ribs and a punctured lung. Ouch. Another health scare happened in 2000, when he fell out of a coconut tree in Fiji. How he got in a coconut tree is anyone's guess, but it made me laugh.

In honor of the Olympics, a quote o' the day:: "If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown, too?" ~ Steven Wright

Just to make me laugh, another quote 'o the day:: "I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine." ~Rita Rudner

And for no reason, another quote o' the day:: "If only someone would do for cows what Bambi did for deer. Cows have been in films, but they haven't starred. I'm still willing to eat a species that is only a supporting player." ~Paula Poundstone

I feel sooo much better. As long as a Hummer doesn't pull in front of me in the McDonald's drive-through (that was last night's "where's that flesh-eating bacteria when you need it" moment), I'll be back.

That's all she wrote. One-handed. Today. Until the next time...

Make my day

(You, too, can produce a stickynote here.)

Wednesday, right on time:: Smack dab in the middle of the week. Not a bad bit of 24 hours, except for those of us born on hump day. You know that old piece of prose:: "Sunday's child is full of grace..." Well, if you spout the whole thing, apparently the only rotten time to be born is on a Wednesday, because the "child is full of woe." So woe is me.

That said, I'd like to share how I wasted, I mean productively helped the world, on this fine day.

I like to waste time on occasion as I rocket through cyberspace, as evidenced above. You, too, can while the hours away at The Generator Blog.

Happy -- but sober -- time:: Chris Gregoire, 61, the governor of Washington State, was not unhappy that she forgot her ID when she and some staffers went out to eat. She got carded. For more on a story that will thrill all female baby boomers, check the story here. There's a photo of her, and though she's a nice-looking woman, I'm pretty sure most barkeeps would know she was legal. I'm sure she didn't care that the guy didn't recognize from, oh, say TV, when she's discussing state matters.

It's about time:: Gizmodo has a guide to explain what in the heck we're supposed to do with cables. For those of us who get a wee bit frustrated wasting several hours with plugs, we thank the writers of the article. Oh, kudos to the photographer, too. Pictures are good for those of us who are thingamajig-deficient.

It's way past time:: A headline to perk up anyone's day: "House panel votes to cite Rove for contempt." Can we cite other Bush trolls for, oh, I don't know, giving us all an eight-year stomachache?

And one more time:: If you missed my blurb about Christian the lion (07.18.08), check this out. It's an update, complete with updated photos of the friends who made a whole lotta folks smile.

I'm outta time:: Apparently, I didn't adhere to my schedule today. Okay, I didn't really have a schedule. But I will. I'll halt my musings with another quote from the all-too-famous "unknown."

"Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you will find a hair stylist you like." ~Unknown

That's all she wrote. Today. Until later...

Just Another Manic Monday

The week begins. And I'm already ranting and raving. Perhaps a quote from, oh, a humorist, will cheer me up. So...

Quote O' The Day:: "Senator: Person who makes laws in Washington when not doing time." ~ Mark Twain

Hmm. Smart guy, that Twain. But he could have included a rollcall of Washington insiders, not just senators, including a certain Department of Justice employee.

Rant:#1:: All day media outlets have been jabbering about Valerie Goodling, the 35-year-old pinhead involved in the illegal -- and certainly inappropriate -- interviewing and hiring of Department of Justice prosecutors. Let's see, The Department of Justice is the law and order branch of our government. Law. And Order.

But you probably read about her, ahem, dubious rejections of prosecutors with outstanding records.

Let's check out these characters. One applicant was stamped REJECT because of his "wife's political affiliations." Another was tossed out because he "appeared to be a liberal Democrat." And of course, the woman "rumored to be a lesbian" had to be kicked off the list. The nerve of these people to think they could follow the law as carefully as Ms. Goodling.

But Valerie Goodling violated federal law. Gee, I'm confused. So she, a federal lawbreaker, decided -- unlawfully -- who can prosecute people like her in America.

And she's an art critic, too:: The very same Valerie Goodling was outed as the person behind "Curtaingate." Remember that "disgraceful" partially nude sculpture of Lady Justice in the Justice Department's Great Hall? Neveryoumind that the sculpture was commissioned in 1933 for $7,000 by well-known artist C. Paul Jennewein. (He did a whole bunch of cool Art Deco-style stuff, and in fact, created 57 sculpture-style elements in that same building.)

Either Herbert Hoover or Franklin Delano Roosevelt must have lost their moral compass to have allowed such filth to be installed. Thank goodness Ms. Goodling was around to ensure that taxpayers spent $7,000 for blue drapes to cover the abominable art.

In conclusion:: Goodling is 35 years old. How can someone that young be so delusional? Valerie, stop hiding behind The Fifth Amendment and go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Read books about why The United States of America was founded. Didn't they teach history when you attended Pat Robertson's university?

Rant#2:: The couple in British Columbia who were proud to announce the birth of their 18th child over the weekend. I saw this story in many different places, but nothing was mentioned about how Ma and Pa support this brood. We all know how easy it is to support 18 children in this day and age. Well, no, actually we don't. The proud pop made it clear that "...because we believe life comes from God and that's the reason we did not stop the life."

Oh, that's clear, all right. So does "we did not stop the life" mean they couldn't use birth control, which was invented by someone else "made by God?" These folks need to check out a site about overpopulation, like this one.

Memo to the new parents:: Over 6.5 billion people occupy Earth, and we're straining resources beyond anyone's imagination. Your insensitivity to the world around you is beyond belief, and is not "happy" news. So please, STOP BREEDING.

Rave:: It's time for me to go to YouTube and re-watch the Geico ad that features a "real person" and Mrs. Butterworth, "talking syrup bottle." Everytime I watch this spot, I laugh out loud. Don't miss the end -- it's priceless.

That's all she wrote. Today. Until later...

I Want To Believe

It's Friday. Just another 24 hours of time, spent wisely or foolishly. I'd like to think I've done something constructive today, that I'm seizing the day, but the jury's still out. Until midnight, at least.

He understood carpe diem:: Randy Pausch, professor, father, husband, friend, author and inspirational person died today at 47. What a wonderful gift he left by publishing his last lecture. Maybe it's just me on the river of Denial, but when you see someone like him on TV, you just "know" he'll beat the cancer. No such miracle happened in that area, but his approach to life is something to consider. Starting now.

The Who Knew? Department:: Half of the world's population has seen a 007 movie, according to the Did You Know site. I wonder what other things half of the world has seen or eaten or heard? I suppose this phenomena will not occur for the movie I'll see this weekend:: X-Files 2: I Want To Believe. I cringe at the critics' reviews. (This from someone who hasn't seen the movie yet.) But I have faith in two of my favorite TV characters, and two actors I enjoy.

True or not:: Pondering the wonders of all things X-File-y, MSNBC counts down six episode ideas that sparked real-life debates. I'm a prove-it-to-me person, but it's fun to speculate. Life continues to mystify the smartest of minds, of which I'm not.

It's a wonder:: The Library of Congress is a treasure trove of facts and fictions. So I checked out the sci/tech section, which holds an archive of everyday questions. For no particular reason, I clicked on the "why do boomerangs return" page. Um. The page said, "The boomerang page is temporarily unavailable. It is being revised. Check back soon for the completed page."

Is there something new in the world of boomerangs? Has something changed about their flight paths? I'll come back over and over and over until this issue is resolved.

Thwarted by that topic, I randomly moved my mouse to "Stone Skipping." It's not the most fascinating topic, but I did learn one thing: A group exists solely to study the subject. The National Stone Skipping Association, or NASSA, informed me the magic angle with a spinning stone and the water should be at about 20 degrees to get the most skips. And that's the truth.

Quote O' The Day:: "I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." ~Diane Ackerman

Randy Pausch certainly understood that sentiment; perhaps we can all grab the thought before it drifts away.

And that's all she wrote. Today. Until later...

Buggin' Me

Quote O' The Day:: "There are two kinds of people -- those who finish what they start, and so on." ~ Robert Byrne

I'll try to plant enough tidbits to finish my daily ramblings. I'll try. But in another quote I acquired somewhere, W.C. Fields reportedly said, "If at first you don't succeed, try, try, again. There's no use being a damn fool about it."

Creepy:: And some people think I overreact when a spider drops off the ceiling onto my arm. Take a peek (if you dare) at MSNBC's cute little "animal" slide show.

Icky:: I love the coast. But I'll hold off on that trip to the watery splendors of France temporarily. Good grief. On July 15, rescue crews were called to the beaches of suburban Nice 500 times. For this.

Makes me uneasy:: I probably shouldn't even mention the site. But you'll find out about it, anyway. Now there's a place to check out if your neighbor's a criminal. Well, that's not the purpose of the Criminalsearches.com, but still. I stuck my neighbor's name in and discovered he had a couple of speeding tickets. Duh. Of course, I checked myself out. I'm clean. But someone with my exact name -- middle name and all -- in my state, did some nasty things. Makes one a wee bit uncomfortable.

Not earth-shattering, but odd:: I was looking for toothpaste the other day, and couldn't spot the flavor and brand I like. It suddenly occurred to me (one of those little cartoon bubbles could have popped over my head right there in the store) that I didn't used to spend so much thinking about toothpaste. So I randomly checked out Colgate's site, where I counted 82 different selections of items to keep your teeth clean. I have a hard enough time remembering to floss.

Bothersome to anyone over 35:: Actress Estelle Getty, as you probably know, passed away yesterday at 84. Funny, funny lady. What irks me is that it's rare to see programs anymore with actors over 25. Helloooo, advertisers -- do ya think it's time to reconsider that 18-49 demographic?

That's all she wrote. For now. Until later...